Wednesday, February 16, 2005

dig me up a hole. please.

been out for the last 16 hours, so pardon me if some words are missing or just doesn't make sense.

i'll start off with yesterday morning.. kept waking up to the alarm 'coz i'm SUPPOSED to get some report done LAST MONDAY! (messing up priorities AGAIN!) i should pass with flying colors if there's a subject such as "MSP - Messed-up Student who cant's Prioritize"
anyways, my pc wouldn't turn on so i went back to another dose of restless sleep 'til 7:30 when i decided to pack up my stuff to get back to school. (yes, i'm using the word SCHOOL for my uni. deal with it!)

so i endured about two hours of one boring lecture and somehow i managed to persuade cik ila to come along with me to catch a movie! heh! (being a sagi is a curse and a gift!) by the time we got there we were horribly hungry though, so we decided to eat something while we're in the cinema. (gara gara nak kejar Gema '05) as usual, at the end of the day i surprised myself by realizing that i've spent rm30! sigh~

feeling all uncomfy (no change of clothes) i went to Gema somewhere around 8 and only got out from the super hot hall when it finished at half past midnight. then, just my luck, i came upon amalina, amalia, hasina and laily and they brought me along for late dinner and gave me a lift back cyberia. awesome! thanks fellas! (and i'm being the typical idiot, still can't quite tell which is amalina, which is amalia. pathetic!)

but what got me tired was not really the 16hours of.. labour, if you let me call it that. but it was really the 16hours of thoughts in my head.
for one, i am somehow getting spooked by the thoughts of ghosts again and it SUX! and i'm trying not to talk about what i think of 'coz people would just say how silly i am. i am silly and yet people keeps telling me what i already know when all i really need is some HELP! sigh~
and then yesterday afternoon cik ila asked me one question that brought back the stupid/embarassing period of my life. sigh~
the thing about me and feelings, i'm stupid enough to let them out but still trying hard to deny them. idiot, i know. and everytime that happens, someone would always be around to remind me about those idiotic moments. and though i am over it, some people might have not and that bugs me. bugs me all the time.

you could probably say that i'm obsessed with my past-faults. suppose i'm afraid that i couldn't change or if i did.. people wouldn't notice it. even worse, people would simply tag me with what i was and refuse to see what i am..
sigh~
and someone has just dedicated me a song that happens to be one of my favorites! so happens that this person will be performing it this wednesday. i guess it would've been sweet if i had cared. sorry dude.

g'nite world.

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