Saturday, May 19, 2007

Honey, I want you..

aaaa!! You know how yesterday I was hoping that I'll be well sustained until fall from the season finales of my favourite shows?? eeeeeeeeek!! I didn't get it from CSI:NY!! aarghhh! How frustrating! It was an intense episode, not a bad one at all, but.. but.. I want more M&Ms!! (that's forum-talk by the way. I'm in no mood to explain what it meant, I'm afraid.)
I've been getting my shows late this week, which is making me rather testy. They're more-than-a-day late and it's making me anxious, laced with anger towards the damn connection! Oh- my nerves..

I was flipping through my writing book the other day ('cause I couldn't write these days, so that's all I do.. flip through my Moleskine) and realized of all the storylines I've created, there is a certain characteristic that keeps repeating on my main character. hmm..
I have a feeling that people wouldn't know I have such a sad soul until they read my work.

I have some ideas about my psychological bursts. (Yes, that's what I'm calling it now. Don't I sound like a shrink? I'm giving terms to my own episodes! ahhahah!!)
Reading the report to my brain test yesterday made me think that instead of having a heart and a brain at their right places.. I think I have mine at opposites. I have a heart in my brain and a brain in the heart -- which is the closest conclusion that made sense to me!
ahhahaha! Don't I sound even more crazy now?

Anyway, I just spent the last couple of hours trying to sell myself with my oh-so-awesome writing. Then, 10 minutes ago, as I was confidently writing why I was meant to write, it hit me. IT. I mean, all this years I was thinking that I am a good writer, having people telling me that I am..
Were they saying it just because I write a lot, or am I really.. a good writer??

Oh God.
Shit.
Not again...

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