Thursday, September 18, 2008


I had an interesting conversation with Hafiz yesterday.
Perhaps we're not the best persons to talk to for each other -- we let each other wallow in our own sadness and depression.
note: I know I've been using the word "depression" quite freely in my blog but I am not clinically diagnosed, hence making the word's association with me pretty subjective.

I was telling him how "happy people" have started to annoy me. Well, I'm not annoyed per se but it gets a little tiring when you can no longer explain to them why you just feel as shitty as you do. Hafiz agreed by saying how it was tiring to be reminded of how happy he used to be.. how people keep telling him now that "only you can make yourself happy.." -- as if he isn't trying.

This must be one of the most repeated quotes I've ever put up on my blog.. despite itself being completely true, I also found that it is seriously flawed;

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.


I honestly wouldn't mind too much if this quote isn't embedded to my brain!
I believe that sometimes, their (everyone I meet) troubles are waaaaayy tinier than mine and Plato had the NERVE of mocking my battle.. my feelings. How could he!

It's sad, really.. to feel like you're blowing your problems out of proportion. (booo.) Everybody should get their chance of being nothing but melodramatic once in a while; even when it's a girl who bawls her eyes out for a broken fingernail. The thing people keep missing in these things are the person's psyche.

Imagine this girl.. who is physically beautiful as beautiful goes. Everybody knows it, and so does she. She knows she isn't smart.. a sense of humour that is barely there.. amazingly untalented and plain. She wishes to be smarter, or gifted in some way but all she had was her looks; she depended on that one sole fact that makes her the least bit special.
Then she broke her fingernail. Sure sure, a fingernail is a fingernail. But she counted on her looks to be PERFECT. It was the only perfection that she was granted with but now she is flawed. Even more flawed than everybody else..

So Plato wasn't being fair when he said those words.. it isn't fair that everytime I think about my troubles, I'd imagine someone out there is laughing about it. It isn't fair to tell Hafiz to get over his heartbreak. It isn't fair to make fun of me not knowing what to do with my life. We're trying our best not to seem too pathetic for you, so we'd appreciate it if you'd just let us wallow in our sadness for a little bit more.
We'll get over ourselves when we can.

Alanis Morisette - That I Would Be Good


HFX said...

im The Hafiz w00t!!

Monkey's Bunny said...


HFX said...

i like your writing. it reminds me of my younger days. keep it up you go girl!

Monkey's Bunny said...

my writing reminded you of your younger days? is that your twisted way of telling me that I'm immature??


HFX said...

good catch. *throws a cookie*

Monkey's Bunny said...

*catches cookie*

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