Monday, December 28, 2009

I don't want to care.

ughhh..
I have no idea why it is SO damn easy for my feelings to get hurt these days.
It's crazy.
How can anyone live this way??
I hate the person I've become.. and I don't even like myself much to begin with!
It feels like.. EVERYTHING matters. I take EVERYTHING personally. Which at the end of the day hurts me like hell.

What's the freakin' point?!
Stupid stupid stupid.
I'm acting like a complete fool again.

I HATE YOU, ME!!!

If I understand myself correctly.. the only way I can be calm is to NOT CARE.
But if I don't care at all, it'd be wrong.
So how can I give a little crap, than a whole lot of crap? Can somebody teach me? 'Coz I really don't know how.
It's not fun being an "extremist". Not knowing when to give things a rest because your heart and mind are too focused on that one sole thing.
It's tiring.. and pathetic. But most of all, it's driving me insane.
I never knew that I was this person.
I don't want to be needy but time and time again it seems like I'm nothing BUT needy.

ughhhhhh!!!

Anyway, I'm in Shah Alam trying to let my mind wander and be distracted.
I need distractions badly. So badly, I could beg for it.
But obviously, I'm failing at this moment.
Which SUCKS!

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