Thursday, April 01, 2010

Tired.

There comes a time when you can do nothing else but sit down and feel sad from tiredness.
Tired from work.
Tired from emotional stress for just having the same old arguments.. yet again.
Tired from not sleeping in your own bed for the past three nights.. (Not counting tonight as I am still in BKI.)

I am having one of the best times on this trip though. I have the wackiest set crew I've ever flown with, it's just awesome -- work trip wise.


But the sectors are crazy.
I can't wait to be home.
I'm already planning for the weekends.. (waxing on Saturday and F1 on Sunday? yippee!) I need to coax my sister into joining me for that Saturday thing though.

Emotional wise though.. I am starting to feel like I am not worth the fight again.
Seems like all the boys that had ever wanted me just didn't want me enough to fight for me.
Whenever an IDEA of another guy comes into the picture, they would.. be FINE with it if the man could make me happy. It's a stupid excuse, really. They'd be upset, yes. But never upset enough to throw a tantrum or be mad with the passion to make me stay.

Just note, boys. Girls wants to feel wanted.
That's why we like the 'big gestures'. We need to know just how badly you guys wanted us. Not need us, but a big.. desperate.. WANT. (Because to 'need' means that you have no choice but to have it. To 'want' would mean that you CHOOSE something over the other. That's how I see it anyway.)

To quote Cheryl Cole; "if it's worth having, it's worth fighting for."
I am fighting for my freakin' life every single day (except for the moments when I light up a cigarette though. haha!) but benda bangang macam ni always makes me feel like NOTHING is ever worth it.
No point to life, you know.

Or perhaps I am just not bright enough to shine in your spaces..

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