This part of my life is called..

I know I wrote "unstable" on my Yahoo! Messenger, but honestly.. I don't know what this part is really called. It's a hundred of jumbled words and none of them meant good.

Just saw The Pursuit Of Happyness. Will Smith really deserved the nomination for an Oscar. He did such a wonderful job. The story about Chris Gardner was.. amazing. Inspirational.
If you haven't seen this film. You probably should. It's a brilliant movie (a tad slow though) even though it depresses you at times. Frustrating too. But I just can't help being touched by his sheer determination to-- of course, be happy.

Made me feel very useless, unfortunately.
Thinking that the only thing I'm determined for right now is getting a full download of CSI: NY episodes since the one I got the other day was in French! How frustrating it was to have waited for 5 whole days and getting them in French. How measly.. and small I am, while somewhere out there.. someone is truly and absolutely working his/her ass off to pursue their goal.

And I felt embarassed when I watched In Her Shoes last weekend. God, I can't let my sisters be Rose. Nor do I want to be Maggie.
I must not settle for this.
This will not do.

So this is a pretty real entry than the ones I've posted since the last few weeks. I promised myself that I was taking a break from blogging so I could work on my very first manuscript.. but I lied.
I haven't written a new paragraph for two months. Two months of spiraling downwards.. sinking to the floor. Probably the main reason why I've been a pretty lousy being; testy and all. Being incompetent depresses me. The incapability of writing -- depresses me.

So now I should go and protect my dream.
Burn the midnight oil or what ever.
'Til the next entry...