Monday, May 31, 2004

where is the good in good-bye?

wish i never have to say goodbye. wish i can stay all night just talk about nothing and never say goodbye. it's always hard to say byes huh? always have.. always will?
hehhe.. entah!

loving this song!!
i guess i most look up to song-writers! they're AWESOME!!

Acidentally In Love by Counting Crows

So she said, "What's the problem, baby?"
What's the problem I don't know.
Well, maybe I'm in love (love)
Think about it everytime
I think about it
Can't stop thinking 'bout i

How much longer will it take to cure this?
Just to cure it cause I can't ignore it if its love (love)
Makes me wanna turn around and face me
but I don't know nothing 'bout love

Come on, come on
Turn a little faster
Come on, come on
The world will follow after
Come on, come on
Cause everybody's after love

So I said I'm a snowball running
Running down into the spring that's coming all this love
Melting under blue skies
Belting out sunlight
Shimmering love

Well baby I surrender
To the strawberry ice cream
Never ever end of all this love
Well I didn't mean to do it
But there's no escaping your love

These lines of lightning
Mean we're never alone,
Never alone, no, no

Come on, Come on
Move a little closer
Come on, Come on
I want to hear you whisper
Come on, Come on
Settle down inside my love

Come on, come on
Jump a little higher
Come on, come on
If you feel a little lighter
Come on, come on
We were once
Upon a time in love

We're accidentally in love
Accidentally in love

I'm In Love, I'm in Love,
I'm in Love, I'm in Love,
I'm in Love, I'm in Love,

Come on, come on
Spin a little tighter
Come on, come on
And the world's a little brighter

Come on, come on
Just get yourself inside her

Love ...I'm in love

this song was on the soundtrack for Shrek 2, and i think it's just.. FANTASTIC!! me love!

10:17 am = what a GREAT way to start a morning!! the best since school started? :D A HAPPY GOOD MORNING, EVERYONNEE!! heehee.. (yeah, i am quite easy to please)
and just realized that it's been two months from when i should've done something! huu~

lovey doveeeyyyy!!

Sunday, May 30, 2004

i am.. amazed. definitely.

now i have all the reasons to thank you!
always. ALWAYS!

i don't have much to say.. but i am most relieved!
maybe i was only imagining, but for a moment there i was really.. AMAZED.
and the feeling is lingering.. happy happy!
:D :D :D

it's harder to remember,
the longer you're away,
when i find silence..

so heyy! thank you for reminding me!!

Maybe I'm Amazed by Jem

Maybe I'm amazed at the way you love me all the time
Maybe I'm afraid of the way I love you
Maybe I'm amazed at the way you pulled me out of time
and hung me on a line

Maybe I'm amazed at the way I really need you

Maybe I'm a girl and maybe I'm a lonely girl
who's in the middle of something
that she doesn't really understand

Maybe I'm a girl and maybe you're the only man
who could ever help me
Baby, won't you help me understand

Maybe I'm amazed at the way you're with me all the time
Maybe I'm afraid of the way I leave you
Maybe I'm amazed at the way you help me sing my song
Right me when I'm wrong

Maybe I'm amazed at the way I really need you


Saturday, May 29, 2004

tomodachi dake


konya no arigatou wa..

is for kak huda for letting me 'steal' her kuat harimau in apple (hey! my shampoo smells like apple, and now my clothes can too??) ekkeke. and also for moving my laundry to a drier place when it rains.
also to ablen for lunch! and kapez for 3ds max installer!
and yeah, to that person who created sound devices such as microphones and speakers.
of course to those artists and bands and writers as well.
and also to that other person for.. anything!

thank youuuuuuuuu!!

Friday, May 28, 2004


just friends, good friends, best friends, special friends

i don't know why i listed that out.. just felt like thinking about friends, i suppose.
hmm.. maybe i shouldn't elaborate more on that. at least not here, yah?

i guess, at the end of the day.. i get a lil calmer since it is after all.. WEEKEND!! i have at least one day of rest before getting hit by another panic-attack. another week ends, and what's in for me next week is another 4 submissions! *pats my own back* congratulations, i knoww..
today's thanks goes to idamunirah for yapping along today's class, and mr fariz farizu for checking on my work! hahhaha!! rase disayangiiii~ *bats eyes* hahhahaha!! (mr fariz farizu is actually one of my ID lecturers!) ironic? ekkekeke
kak ida got stuck in the lift of fcm building.. ironically, the same day kak huda got stuck in our block's elevator! (just tonight, actually!) boys and girls, you know what today's word is?

hahhaha! i am lack of sleep and somehow i feel drunk!
oh, did this
Whats does your personality rate from 1-10? by morning_prayer
Your first full name
Your personality rates a10
your best quality isyoure talented
your worst quality isyou start conflicts alot
this is becauseyou were born this way
Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!

Thursday, May 27, 2004

*sigh* hello, can't you at least look my way?

hahhahahahh ahahahhahah ahahhahahahahhahah ahahahhaha!!!
no, i am NOT happy. as a matter of fact, i am waaayy too depressed about how this week is going!
it's like.. falling.. for all the wrong reasons.
(sejak bila ade right reasons?)

1. haven't done my 3D for tomorrow's submission - which will require me to print it on THREE A3 sized paper - which i have no money for - and the transport to go to sunway. *sigh*
2. most probably will be staying here for the weekend - alone - 'coz everybody else are going home - including prisca! - going to have to do laundry here - which the spin mode is rosak, going to have to perah manually - and again, with no money! *sigh*
3. oh, did i mention that even if i have the money, i have no idea how to go for printing?? o yeah, i did - not because i have no friends.. but macam MENYIBUK. reti? penyebokk! *sigh*
4. it's hard being in ID alone when your real friends are not - too much work - tooo much - doing it alone - crap! *sigh*
5. the wrong people are doing the right things - the right people are doing wrong things - i am HORRIBLY stubborn! - breaks myself apart, i know. *sigh*
6. should really get things out in the open (YOU HEAR ME??!) 'coz i can't keep feeling guilty like this - well, i can - i know what i might do later - but you don't - please start saying something.. *sigh*
7. feeling MIGHTY horrible - and today.. i feel like a glass door or something - you wouldn't give too much thought about it unless it hit you right in the face. *sigh*

8. and i am sighing so much - and you know what people say about sighing - tiring.. everything is simply tiring.

i demand a happy ending!

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

okay okaaay..

symptoms of stress :
_ frequent headaches
_ muscle tension or stiffness
_ heart pounding
_ poor concentration
_ fatigue
_ depressed
_ irritability
_ frustration
_ moodiness
_ racing thoughts
_ restlessness
_ forgetfulness
_ sleep disturbance
_ decreased satisfaction with work
_ decreased enjoyment with friends and family


stressed out.
need - to - calm - down.
if this keeps on, i KNOW i'll die young.. no need for anyone to suggest that to me.

takde rest ke ID oyy..!!!!!

an excruciating one month, it has been.
i HATE having without.
dekat tapi jauh.
i HATE distance!! i HATE silence!
it's AMAZING how close people are actually to you but you know NOTHING what so ever of them!
at this point, i hate EVERYTHING 'coz i have to be without!!

tiresome WORKS!! stupid WITHOUT!
just STUPID!

Distance by Evan and Jaron

The sky has lost its color
The sun has turned to gray
At least that's how it feels to me
Whenever you're away
I crawl up in the corner
as I watch the minutes pass
each one brings me closer to
The time you'll be back; you're coming back

I can't take the distance
I can't take the miles
I can't take the time until the next time I see you smile
I can't take the distance
And I'm not ashamed
That I can't take a breath without seeing your name

And I can brave a hurricane
and still be standing tall
when all the dust has settled down
but i cant take the distance.

I still believe in feelings
But sometimes I feel too much
I make believe you're close to me
But it ain't close enough
Not nearly close enough

I can't take the distance
I can't take the miles
I can't take the time until the next time I see you smile
I can't take the distance
And I'm not ashamed
That I cant take a breath without seeing your name

And I can brave a hurricane
and still be standing tall
when all the dust has settled down

I can't take the distance
I can't take the miles
I can't take the time until the next time I see you smile
I can't take the distance
And I'm not ashamed
That I cant take a breath without seeing your name

I cant take the distance, the distance

it wouldn't even help if i scream for help 'coz REALLY.. you couldn't listen.
that's what stresses me the most.


this song was playing on my winamp.
and i am with rosie, singing to it.
and i was reminded of the times we had in our old room.
messing around with guitars.
and i was reminded of a particular period that i just can't help laughing at.
good times.
old times.
i missed those times.
i am missing some people.
VERY.. i suppose.


why do i keep being reminded by things aa??

hope you're doing well..

o well, finally got my two drawings done. i should be proud!
and sleeping.

Cardigans - Carnival

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

a ring to that name.

wah wahhhh!
what a day. macam.. constantly reminded of.. things.

haihh~ breaks my heart lah!
but as i was constantly reminded during class; human are the best adaptor to their surroundings.
i'll adapt to things someday, if not today, yah?

today.. i'm gonna thank my kakak hosmet.. skin? (actually i haven't asked her name, myself yet.. terok!) but she gave me a lift to my afternoon class. :D tengkiuuuuu!!
and tengkiu rosie for sending me the song!!! me like!

okay. i should make myself very busy tonight. i have TONS of work and if i put it on hold even longer, i would probably DIE at the end of the week!! haiyohhh!

Hello Hello by Sophie Ellis Bextor

Hello Hello
Where did I go
I lost my head
Went into your mind instead
I stayed there

So now you all know
I'm weak I told you so
I'll never come home

I've been on quite a journey
I saw myself from another side
Can you be patient while I return
With what I've learned can we share it all
I want to start it over
I want to feel how I used to be
I'll take your hand and I'll show you
Here is my heart can we share it all

I'm cold alone
The pain is strong
I'm coming back to where you are my love I know
Believe me now
I know that it's hard
You can't see every card
Don't know me for now

I've been on quite a journey
I saw myself from another side
Can you be patient while I return
With what I've learned can we share it all
I want to start it over
I want to feel how I used to be
I'll take your hand and I'll show you
Here is my heart can we share it all
I hope so

okay.. with that, i should shut myself up because i'm dizzy, tired, and crazy!

"i'm wearing ladies underwear"

"it's a thooonnggg!"

hahhahhaa!! saw shrek 2 and i guess it was okay. macam.. taklaa se-klakar mane, but it was quite enjoyable. puss in boots was absolutely ADORABLE!! :x but, i suppose i enjoy more the anticipation of waiting for harry potter and the prisoner of azkaban! hahhahaa! yahhh tak sabaaarrrr!! (they showed a different trailer in the cinema!!!)
all and all.. my outing was NEAT!! i guess the company was enjoyable! hehhe! (hope i wasn't a bad company as well.. huhuuu~)

tadi dalam keta macam fikir banyak nak tulis.. sekali depan ni rase tatau ape dah nak tulis.

ohh.. tengkiuuuuuuu!!!

i think papa is angry at me for something.. but biarkanlah itu orang.
i totally ignored my application report.. padan muka ini orang.

at the end of the day.. somehow i can only think of this word..
de-vo-tion Ardent, often selfless affection and dedication, as to a person or principle.

wouldn't it be better if such word didn't exist, for then there would be no name to such feelings.. kan?

okay.. guess i'll go straight to bed. i don't feel like researching at the moment. maybe in the morning. (so i say!)
so.. gudnite..! wherever you may be.

Monday, May 24, 2004


enjoying this old puddle of mud's song right now.
ohh.. and also liking the rasmus' in the dark..!

actually sangat stressed at this point.
i have the rights for hating how everything are right now.

okay.. here's an interesting fact for those who are curious..
The purpose of breasts is to produce and store milk when a woman has a baby. The reason men are attracted to them is probably because they’re a sign of fertility (being able to have a baby).
hahahhahahha!! gatal kamu!

Sunday, May 23, 2004

i guess i am still trying.

trying to understand..
trying to compromise..
trying to shed a little of my 'individualistic'..!

this was my weekend:
1. getting hit on the hip by the car door. (which hurts horribly, you should try it yourself!!!)
2. baby-sit izzati for about an hour by myself (which was utterly entertaining!!) i think i qualify myself as a great aunt!! hahhaha! minus changing diapers lahh.. haven't tried that in real life. hehheh!
3. owe dida my life.
4. founding out for the hundredth time that montoya is an arse! he is.. REALLY! so is sato, by the way. (they're F1 drivers, if you're not familiar with the names) montoya cam bangla! hahahahahah!! (he's actullay columbian, but i hate his accent..?)
5. getting panic when i lost something someone gave me.
6. found out that i have more than 5 out of 23 symtomps of stress, thank you very much!
7. going up and down cyberia three times and yet, i didn't bump into 'cowok indon yang kacak' even once!! (what a bummer!)
8. realizing that i still have FOUR assignments to be done through the week!!!


Thursday, May 20, 2004

it's true..

getting what you want is easy.. knowing what you want isn't

simply torn.

humm.. just let that be.
actually i wanted to type all the things that's been bothering my mind but i'd really hate giving out my thoughts at this moment, y'know! it's like.. figure it out sendiri lahh!!!
i've been telling how i feel, and some have already gotten me understood but i'm still left here hanging to ponder about things myself and that is so UNFAIR!!

it just stinks!

you have a huge book of secrets that i can't read while mine is wide open for you to look at anytime.

and what stinks even worse is the fact that i suddenly thought of this after about 3 weeks of pure silence!
i think you got me wondering even more when you're not around lahhh.
you're like.. soooo you!

by the way, i have 4 assignments to be done by next week, thank you!

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

"would i be selfish if i told you to stay around?"

haai.. riyoteki desu. kamoshirenai.

Tuesday, May 18, 2004

mama rupenye yang nak blanje makan...

i guess itulah kelebihan tinggal dekat ngan umah.

my parents and dida came right after they got back from work.
*big hug*
macam.. makin banyak rase kesusahan, macam lagi berkobar nak jadi budak baik!
(ye keeee wanieeeeee???)
(even i doubt that!!)

so, after sehari berlapar, dapatlah makaan.. :))

i guess i am quite spoilt.
i don't usually get the things i want (immediately, at least!) but when it comes to err.. support? they'll be THERE! heehee!
i guess everyone should be thankful that i was not born into a rich family or surely i would've been a brat! ahhahahahha!!

skarang kita tunggu bila mmu nak kasi duit ptptipu kita!
tengkuk dah sakit sebab darned stress sepanjang ari! tak guna btol.
tengkiu kepada sesape yang sempat mengasihani wanie. hehhehe!

lapar nye lapar nyeeee............

rase macam... entah la!
but i know what is better than feeling this way.

lapar nye lapar nyeeee!!
but i can't afford to spend even a cent!
it's tuesday.. and i only have rm10. and i still have to print 2 pages of A3 before friday.
faham tak perasaan nye?
macam.. tetiba sekarang.. money is like.. sooooo hard to get!!
bencinye asyik fikir pasal duit!
bencinye bencinye!!!!!

ptptipu + mmu = bongok!!

i am so poor.
feels like i should sell something but i don't really own anything worth selling.
(singasong: jual bodi jual bodiii~ AHHAHAHAHAH!!)
i hate being poor!!
i'm a sagittarian, for God's sake.. how do i know to SAVE UP??!!!
ini pon dah pemalas makan..

sedihnye sedihnyeee..
i've come to the point where i'm even segan to ask money from my parents.
sedihnye sedihnyeee..

kamon kamon sape nak blanje wanie makan??

nak duit nak duiiiit!!


wanie gila.
need i say more?

cepatlah pagi.. when i'll get busy and forget the things i want to forget.
i want to get busy.
i need to forget.


[1:09 am]

had a bad dream this morning. well, i guess it depends how you interpret (spelling??) "bad".
as for my case.. the moment i saw 'a certain something' in my dream, i woke up! and the time was 6 something..
i guess it was pretty lame.. in my dream, i got an sms from a certain someone who told me something that just made my heart dropped. *sigh* dahlaa message tu incomplete!! grrr. i wish i didn't care as much.. hummph.
a dream is just a dream, 'aight?

promise, okay?
promise me....

and heyy, this is my week's horoscope! ~HAHHAHHAHAA!!
Sagittarius Horoscope
For The Week Starting May 17, 2004
You seem to be in a holding pattern as far as your emotions go. You are waiting to see what the other person will do or feel. This seems to last until August before a decision is reached so you will have to be patient and make the most of this summer. The only thing you must be aware of is going overboard on anything you do or say. Take a nice middle of the road.

okaylaa.. not really MINE.. it's all Sagittarian's horoscope lah!
(lamanye tunggu auguuussssttt!!! ekkekekkeke!)

Monday, May 17, 2004

it's amazing..

how you can feel so much things in one particular moment.

and what i can really say about it is just

class was okay earlier today. but i think i played too much with the net send thingy that i couldn't really get what the lecturer wanted us to do. heehee. and jai gave me some silly silly teka teki yang jawapannye same merepek!
still haven't printed out the essay i should be sending tomorrow.
ohh! ID class tomorrow morning will be post-poned to wednesday. read: bangun lambaaaaaat!! hoyehh!!
MPD class grouping dah selesai.. thanks to the ones who helped out. :D

having headache from all the nervous rush.
i don't like the way things are.
that's just it.

liking dishwalla for the moment!
Home by Dishwalla

I'm so sick and tired
of all these things
that drag me down

I've got no where to go
they say that life
is in these hands
you give everything
you give yourself away you give
and still you choke

and find yourself running for the door

come and take me
lead me to your door
take me where you are
lead me to your door
at least just for a while

its some kind of life
forever days
we're in the cold
unfamiliar way

so take this fear
and fade it out
it won't make me sad
cause I get sentimental lord
in other ways
and I don't want to let me down here anymore

so come and take me home
lead me to your door
take me where you are
lead me to your door
and let me in
just let me in
and let me leave
just let me leave this world
come on now let me leave this world
at least just for a while

9:23 pm = wanie dah ngantuk lepas makan spaghetti masak ngan bahijah. ohh! did this quiz! :D :D
crystal heart
Heart of Crystal

What is Your Heart REALLY Made of?
brought to you by Quizilla
interrestiinngg.. ekkekeke!

..and it's also amazing that it rained today.

maseh suka


banyak nye bintang malam ni.
wanie tak nampak bulan malam ni, tapi bintang sangat banyak!
sangat suka.
maseh suka.

kalau laah..

malam yang indah!

wishing you well....

Sunday, May 16, 2004

it'll stay hot 'til september

that's what i heard! feels like fainting already. haiyohh!

had a stupid saturday. mengecewakan for all sorts of reason.
but it got better today 'coz nina, jasmin and IZZATI came for a visit. well, they had a wedding to attend so, visit juga lah kan? hehhe! that little girl kaan.. haihh! sangat geraaaaaammm!!!
sukaa.. sangat sukaa.. suka suka sukaaaaa!! :x :x

so hot aa these dayss?? adoooi lah!

okay, i have plenty of things to do..
[5:37 pm]

just got back from dinner.
and just to let you guys know that i've finished all my assignments!!!
just have to go to printgate and print some things out before friday! :D

Friday, May 14, 2004

hahhahaha!! HONESTLY ?


Who's Your Anime Boyfriend?

isn't this guy like.. the sailormoon hero?? is that to say that i am... usagi the freakin' SAILORMOON???!!!
summer: eeuuww!!
tapi takpelaa kan, i wouldn't complain if i were to get a handsome prince for a boyfriend!! hahhahhaa!
(actually i tried doing the quiz for the second time and i still get mamoru!)

tatau nak tulis ape dah. will update more later after class probably. :D
11:43 am]

it IS possible after all.. :))
ID is officially my thing! :)) it's funny how i can't imagine myself being in mr. K or chematto's class at all. heehee! things are just funny..

and i realize today that talking to more people can actually make me happy! hahahhaha!!
peliknyee lah today.

class ended 20 minutes after 6, and i didn't mind all that much. the weird fact was, nobody were!!
amazing yah?
today we did 3D modelling and though it really wasn't favorable to me and the computer went stupid/crazy when i almost had it finished, i think it was pretty okay lah!
my assignments dah bertambah lagi.. but i don't mind that much!

aaaaaaaahhh~ loving school for the subjects!! weird, huh?
dahh! me tired from class and walk.
have a good weekend peeps~!!

Switchfoot - Meant To Live

Thursday, May 13, 2004

The Influence of Birth Order

Wanie, your position as youngest child shows most strongly in your creativity.

Similar to other youngest children, you likely have an astonishing ability to generate original ideas. From an early age, your natural tendency was probably to stand out from your older siblings through your unique contributions. By comparing yourself to your older siblings, your creativity naturally evolved through your desire to be imaginative in choosing your goals and your approach to achieving them. Like other youngest children, you tend to be especially innovative when feeling optimistic or when undertaking tasks that bring you joy and satisfaction.

Birth order influences your relationship with your parents, siblings (if you have them) and how you ultimately learn to interact with the world. It can provide an insightful way to better understand your approach to friendships, romance, and how you meet life's challenges.

tadi teman si bahijah pegi jumpa ilsa. time lunch, i watched the tv, tengok video clip william hung!! merepekk btol.
and then i was reminded about a gedik-rocker video i saw some weeks ago. asha penah mention to me aritu, and then semalam terdengar lagu tu kat radio so i downloaded the song!! ekkeke!! just so i can imagine the video again. hahhahaha!
rockers gedikk
Love Is Only A Feeling by The Darkness

The first flush of youth was upon you when our eyes first met
And i knew that to you and into your life i had to get
i felt light-headed at the touch of this strangers hand
an assault my defences systematically failed to withstand

cos you came at a time
when the pursuit of one true love in which to fall
was the be all and end all

love is only a feeling
(drifting away)
when im in your arms i start believing
(its here to stay)
but love is only a feeling

the state of elation that this union of hearts achieved
i had seen, i had touched, i had tasted and i truly believed
that the light of my life
would tear a hole through each cloud that scudded by
just to beam on you and i

Love is only a feeling
(drifting away)
when i'm in your arms i start believing
(its here to stay)
but love is only a feeling

if you've seen the video, you'd probably think the lead singer is gedik as well, lah~ heehee!
(i am liking the song, and i think the video was amusing.. ekkekeke!)
sekarang ni macam tengah suka banyak lagu sebenanye, sampai tak tahu nak post lagu mana dulu.. heehee!

kul 4 ade kelas human factors & interaction.. nak pegi ke aaa?
panas nyee kat luar. ngantuk sungguh perasaannye.. uhuu~

update!! : [8:51 pm] class was AWESOME!! i thank fate for the fact that i am not as lazy as i thought! AHHAHAHA!! tomolo got 3dmax though.. yikes~!! but anyways.. if ID is as this.. i have no regrets at all!!! hoyehh!!

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

gugur jantung gue


i just saw a REAAAAAAAAALLY cute indon guy. (i guess he's studying in limkokwing)
waduuuh~! sangat sukaaaaaaaaaaaa!!
now THIS is the best example of LIKE AT FIRST SIGHT.
felt like running to him and give him my rm10 just for walking pass me.

he didn't even look my way, though.. (perhaps 'coz he was preoccupied with his two friends?)

he's like a much much MUCH cuter version of someone i know.
adooi~ suka nyeeeeeeeeee..
the original version..
and the cuter one as well!


i wonder if i'll ever get to see him again.

tengkiu mama papa dida for coming by and brought me to eat NASIK since it's been a while. :D
and HAPPY!!

bagus eh duduk cyberia nih?

:x :x :x

just put on my cicak face

and everything will seem just fine..

heehee! i seem to put on this certain face when i amuse myself with my thoughts, and nina and dida would like to call it 'the cicak face'. mine lah. when i think about it.. i think it really does look like a lizard of somewhat.
cute cicak lah kan.. ekkekeke!

am sooooo tired!! it's hot outside while i was walking back from class just now. tak aci taaauu!!
DM class was done by 11:30.
MI class was done by 12:30.
ID? it ended at 1:10!! tak aciiiiiiiii!! suka macam nieee taaauuuu!! dahlaa selasa kelas lebih satu..! hummph! :P but i am free this afternoon. :D :D 'coz i'll be having class on friday afternoon while the rest doesn't. haaaihh~ lain aje!
but class was amazingly fine! me like laah, setakat ini. will be starting on modelling in friday, i suppose.. so tak tahu lah masih akan suka ke tidak.. haiyohh! takuut.-

okay, i know that i've been posting some lots about my classes... i think it's because i'm surprised kot! hehhe!
yaaaaaaaahhh!! kan best kalau skola berkekalan seronot seperti beginii! :D :D

shocking shocking daay!

1. i had FUN during my real first MID alone! (before this i always thought i need someone close to me during class, and as all the majoring is now confirmed.. i actually am alone!) anyways! it's pretty amusing how i actually smiled at the end of my class.. ekkeke! and coming out without any assignment at hand, to top it off! ekkeke! we had a pretty merepek discussion during class so, heyy! i'm okay at this!! ekkeke! (at least for the time being!)

2. nina gave me a REALLY shocking news. i thought it was something about a particular someone, and it turned out to be about someone!! HERSELF!! wawawaaaaaaa!!! nina i am actually happy!! even though it's worrying. huhuhuhuu.. but i am excited about the incoming baby!!!! weeeeeeeee~!! i am going to be an aunt of two babies by the end of this year! yeaaaaaaaayyy~!!! izzati's going to get a baby sister or brother!! i hope he/she is going to be just as cute and sweet!! ekkeke!! and what's more, according to the baby's due.. he or she is going to be a sagittarian!! AHHAHAHAHHA!! awesome!! :))

3. amused myself while walking back cyberia alone after class!! (mind you, i was a bit cranky before class started because ID is the only one that's having class at 4 to 6 - if i'm not mistaken, 'coz i don't know about FA and VR's schedule!) i guess i don't mind walking alone in the evening sebab tak panas!! ekkeke!

okaaay.. i still can't quit talking about ID with lily. hehhehh! tengkiu for listening!!!

last night, i was supposed to have dinner with my family.. but i told them to post-poned to tomorrow 'coz i wanted to get together with my friends! hehhe!
had dinner with the hobbitses and drogo and jai at IOI kenny roger's. :D kenny roger's situ tak sepemurah in OU lah! keciwaa~
later drogo treated us STARBUTTS!! ekekke! tengkiuuuuu!! had rhumba!

aaaah~ i remember the last time i had a venti. lily, did you remember when? haaaaih~ i am still wondering if i ever get to give the 'thing' away.
orang tak sudi, wanie dah penat nak offer.. takdelaa desperate sangat oyy. :P
you know where to find me, yahh!

later temankan lily meeting up ilsa (and carlos) in pj. ilsa poyo!! ahhahahaha!! lily, you know why! ekkeke!!

okay.. i am honestly tired and sleepy from the full school schedule today. should sleep laah!!! haiyohhh~
right after i find some things about ergonomics lahh okay? :D (so i say)

it turned out to be a good day after all.
wouldn't it be great if everyday can make me as happy as i am right now? heehee.
wishful thinking.. everyone knows that.

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

congrats koraaang!

congrats to those who got MI.
lily, dar, azarul..
me just had to endure a 15-second scream by lily just now..
continued by a moan by prisca 'coz lily bumped her head to her jaw. ahhahahhaha!
rosie happens to be missing somewhere with jai, probably.

me. no comment.
still trying to cope with my fears.
yaaaaaaaah~ didaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! :(

Runaway Train by Soul Asylum

Call you up in the middle of the night
Like a firefly without a light
You were there like a blow torch burning
I was a key that could use a little turning

So tired that I couldn't even sleep
So many secrets I couldn't keep
Promised myself I wouldn't weep
One more promise I couldn't keep

It seems no one can help me now
I'm in too deep
There's no way out
This time I have really led myself astray

Runaway train never going back
Wrong way on a one way track
Seems like I should be getting somewhere
Somehow I'm neither here nor there

Can you help me remember how to smile
Make it somehow all seem worthwhile
How on earth did I get so jaded
Life's mystery seems so faded

I can go where no one else can go
I know what no one else knows
Here I am just drownin' in the rain
With a ticket for a runaway train

And everything is cut and dry
Day and night, earth and sky
Somehow I just don't believe it

Runaway train never going back
Wrong way on a one way track
Seems like I should be getting somewhere
Somehow I'm neither here nor there

Bought a ticket for a runaway train
Like a madman laughin' at the rain
Little out of touch, little insane
Just easier than dealing with the pain

Runaway train never coming back
Wrong way on a one way track
Seems like I should be getting somewhere
Somehow I'm neither here nor there

Runaway train never comin' back
Runaway train tearin' up the track
Runaway train burnin' in my veins
Runaway but it always seems the same

i still don't know how i feel..
maybe a Higher Power does... :)

okay. patut siap siap apa yang patut for my next class.

Monday, May 10, 2004

cranky and unhappy

what is there to say about today?

well, i went to sleep around 5 in the morning with practically nothing to do.
just didn't feel like sleeping before that time.
woke up around 9 for internet application at 11. for the time being, i am liking the class. hahhahaa!! rase cam pandai sikit while most classes just makes me feel stupid. ahhahahha!! the tutor were teaching basic htmls and told us to get some books. i probably better get the book for dreamweaver. stupid at that one.

after class me and the girls headed to tesco to get some home stuff; broom, floor soap, scouring pad, air freshener, yadaaa~ those things. lily, prisca and myself also got some make-up stuff. heehee! i am officially stating here that i have a complete set of things! it should keep me preoccupied before i get bored of the colors. hehhehe!

my comment of make-up for the time being would be: FUN!!
hahhaha!! can't help myself from laughing laa at the end of my 5-15 minutes. ekkekeke!

anyways! moving on..
after coming back.. all i did was sitting in front of the computer.
so in a while, i'd go and get myself a good shower and sleep! yaaah~

my myyy..
why is it soooo freakin' hot these days??!
sungguh tak tahaaaaaannn!!!

panas dan bosan, lalalalaaa
i can't take the distance


verry funny.

end of story.

all i do is sigh

if there's a word to describe myself at this moment, it would be;
" troubled "
as i feel like my head is bursting.

Angels Or Devils by Dishwalla

This is the last time
That I'm ever gonna come here tonight
This is the last time, I will fall
Into a place that fails us all, inside

I can see the pain in you
I can see the love in you
But fighting all the demons will take time
It will take time

The angels they burn inside for us
Are we ever
Are we ever gonna learn to fly
The devils they burn inside of us
Are we ever gonna come back down
Come around
I'm always gonna worry about the things that could make us cold

This is the last time
That I'm ever gonna give in tonight
Are there angels or devils crawling here?
I just want to know what blurs and what is clear, to see

Well I can see the pain in you
And I can see the love in you
And fighting all the demons will take time
It will take time

The angels they burn inside for us
Are we ever
Are we ever gonna learn to fly
The devils they burn inside of us
Are we ever gonna come back down
Come around
I'm always gonna worry about things that could break us

If I was to give in, give it up
And then
Take a breath, make it deep
'Cause it might be the last one you get
Be the last one
That could make us cold
Can make us cold

I'm always gonna worry about the things that could make us cold

read my thoughts if you please.

Friday, May 07, 2004

i just.... i simply don't know...

i never knew..
about anything..
about everything...

takut nyee.. takut nyee.. takut nyeee!!
hontoni kowaii.
have you ever felt soo scared that it just gets hard to breathe?

it's so hard to breathe. and it feels like it will never end.
i just feel like running away, i wish i know where to.
i don't know.. i simply don't know.
is it possible if i were to pack my bags and never return?
can i pack my bags and never return?
it's simply amazing.. how i don't feel like caring for anything any longer. forget everything, anything, anyone.. and just leave.

but the truth is.. i cared so much that it mattered this much.

i am scared and depressed.
and i don't know where to turn to 'cause i know they'd say "i told you so".
two biggest things that is happening in my life.
i've probably made the two biggest mistakes of my life.

not to fight for the course i was actually full-heartedly interested in.
and feeling the things i shouldn't have felt on the first place.

i never knew how it'll turn out.

i am such a cow!
no.. i am actually as low as dirt.

i hate being stupid! i hate being depressed!
and i absolutely hate the fact that i can't quit yapping!!!!

in case you've misunderstood this whole post..
i am not really "complaining".. i am simply pouring my heart out because i don't think i can to my friends.
i just can't.

'cause you see....
they've told me so...
only i was too pigheaded and stubborn and stupid to listen and think about anything thoroughly.

so the future is not mine to see.
i wish it was so.. as i need some reassurance of something right now.
though i know it may not come.
it may never came.

it may never....

Thursday, May 06, 2004



stupid 52cents!!!
that i'm saving in case of a time when i'll reaaaaaaally need it!!!

wouldn't it be great if i have

stupidity shows.


if i were to ask why?
would you tell me the cause?

i am honestly dumbfounded.

i've got too many questions with no one to answer it.
i'm getting scared of every single thing even more than i used to.
i'm having weird thoughts these days.
sakit nye kepala having these things running around my mind.
real headache.

i can never cope with distance.
i never knew how.
it really is.

me and rosie walked to class.. which wasn't on! (laugh here)
then we hung about hb3 and see the new alpha groupies - which was merely amusing!
dah dua hari berturut dah ni kena kaco ngan diorang nih! ekekkeke! and rosie was annoyingly perasan today! ahahhaha!
then we waited for lily to finish her majoring test. managed to talk some bits with kak alin in the mean time.

i'm still up for nothing.
nothing is worse than nothingness,
but that's what i keep getting.

will be taking my supplementary test in the afternoon. should glue myself to the computer so i can answer the questions. i really should take these sort of things seriously.

right now,
i'll be in my room resting.
tired of having nothing all the time.

i had a bad day again.
i know you wouldn't understand.


takde mood nye for anything.

just got this downloaded btw;
Anywhere by Evanescence

Dear my love, haven't you wanted to be with me
And dear my love, haven't you longed to be free
I can't keep pretending that I don't even know you
And at sweet night, you are my own

Take my hand
We're leaving here tonight
There's no need to tell anyone
They'd only hold us down
So by the morning's light
We'll be half way to anywhere
Where love is more than just your name

I have dreamt of a place for you and I
No one knows who we are there
All I want is to give my life only to you
I've dreamt so long I cannot dream anymore
Let's run away, I'll take you there

We're leaving here tonight
There's no need to tell anyone
They'd only hold us down
So by the morning's light
We'll be half way to anywhere
Where no one needs a reason

Forget this life
Come with me
Don't look back, you're safe now
Unlock your heart
Drop your guard
No one's left to stop you
Forget this life
Come with me
Don't look back, you're safe now
Unlock your heart
Drop your guard
No one's left to stop you now

We're leaving here tonight
There's no need to tell anyone
They'd only hold us down
So by the morning's light
We'll be half way to anywhere
Where love is more than just your name

dead bored.
and lazy.
and curious.
and scared.

yes, scared.

Wednesday, May 05, 2004

my first day


and angry.

i just don't seem to get people very well so i just better shut it.

ID turns out to be really scary.
really really.

and credit tinggal 50sen!!!!!!
..jangan bagitau dida or mama okeh!


nina & dida

tengkiuuu koraaang!!!

in my new ROOM with my new ROOMIES!!

a bit aje laaa.. ahhahahaahahahaahahahah!!

but rosie is missing at the moment. heheheh!!
okeh! nak kemas barang!
can't wait for next day!


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