Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Pointless rambling.

12:43 am
I was thinking of a time I was in the car with Dida. We were from KL, heading back to Shah Alam on the highway. I was telling her about my then recent endeavour and how I can't see myself in a commitment anytime soon.

It was then when she told me she was envious that I have always had choices and she had only wished for just one man who would adore her unconditionally.

My sister had a theory for people like me.
The reason to why we could not commit is possibly because the "right man" has not arrived yet, or we have loved and lost.

I laughed when she said it. Quickly agreeing that my man hasn't arrived yet.
As much as I hate admitting to this.. the latter of the theory might not be so wrong after all.. I think, I have.. loved and lost.
My quite unrequited love. heehee. The stupid git!

He shall not find this out. Even if he reads this.. he shall wonder if it is him I am thinking of after all. God, I hope he won't find out! I'd surely hate my feelings to be known so plainly! Then again, it may be the reason why..

Oh crap! I'm obviously.. rambling. And bored. I SO refuse to let any man have the satisfaction that he had left such an impact on me, yet CRAP! Been watching a little too much love stories, plenty more of love-oriented storybooks.
I'm still discussing this topic apparently.
M-O-V-I-N-G O-N!

Right now sitting in my bed while my sister is very much fast asleep. Bored. I'm SO bored.
I feel like writing something significant in my journal but I can't seem to pick a topic. I refuse to choose anything depressing!

Okay.. so here.
I don't know what people do in their free time. Where do they go????
So my sister reckons that EVERYONE goes to some bars around here. The Dutch were after all the founder of Heineken.
But really? EVERYONE?? That's just.. NOT FAIR! What happens to coffee lovers like me? And you'd thought that Starbucks had taken over the world.. well, not Rotterdam!
And now I'm REALLY missing a good.. huge plastic container of Rhumba Frappucino. Man! Should've gotten one when I saw it in Frankfurt or Paris. grrr.

Okay. Today marks one month I've gone out of my country. I do miss some things of it. There's no place like home, right Dorothy?

It's interesting though, to be able to see how things work around the world. Being brought up in Malaysia and spending the most of my life there is.. a privellage. It really is.
For instance, back in Malaysia, if you look nothing like Malay you could say that no one would speak in Malay to you. People in stores would try their best to say things in English, yeah? Here, no matter where you came from and how you look NOTHING like Dutch or anything remotely caucasian, they'd automatically speak in Dutch to you.
After a while it gets tiring to keep on telling people, "Oh sorry, I don't speak Dutch. Do you speak English?"

heehee. And THAT'S why I'm only best being put in English speaking countries like the UK! US! AHHAHHAHA!! I'm pushing it, aren't I?

Going on more errands later in the day. Should get to sleep now. Good night world.

ooo yeah,

4:58 pm
Just got back from errands! Next, I need to tackle my chores.


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