Thursday, November 21, 2002

What's there to love about myself?
Yeah.. I sucked loaaads!!
Crappy crappy mood. Going to sleep in a bit.. somehow I wish I'd wake up to find myself somewhere else than this place.
Crappy crappy feeling. Went out for break-fast with Ana and Alitt.. supposedly with Sheeya, BJ and Mya but they were at En. Anis' place and they got there a bit late.
Crappy crappy night. Forced to do some things that I try to avoid. Forced to stay out for sOoOooOo long when all I wanted to do was totally the opposite.
Can't remember how many times I chanted that I wanna go back.
Can't remember how many times I speak of that certain name.
Can't remember of the times I imagined the happier things I could do at that same moment.
Can't remember how many times I wished I just went back.
Can't remember of the times I hoped that I'm talking to a certain someone..
And now that I'm back.. I'm still chanting that same name over and over again.. and say how horrible I felt.. and still feel.. Wanting so much to say how much I missed out this night. Wishing so much that I could say how much I rather be with him while I'm out..
But before he gave me any chance.. what did he do??
He blew me off.............. no explaination is required, huh?

Crying inside.. Obviously you can't see that... or maybe you just refuse to..

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