Ick.

I was surfing through mphonline.com -- NOT GOOD! I'm not supposed to be looking at books!!! 30% off The Secret. aaack!! I'm not supposed to know that!! I'm also not supposed to know that there's a 30% off on Cecelia Ahern's Thanks For The Memories. ughh!! Damn MPH Newsletter.

gah! So then I looked through H&M, DP, F21 and Women's Secret for other inspirations. hahaha! But then Dida reminded me that there isn't any sale on right now. ughh! I don't want to be buying things only to find out in two months that I'd spent an extra RM30 for it! booo! Shopping blows! I am not the typical girl! I still wear last season's clothes like I got it last week! bahahhaa!
Seriously, books + food > clothes pshh!

mm.. so I've been thinking, you know.. other than the possibility of becoming senile as I grow old, I'd probably lose my hearing as well. See, when I try to drown out my thoughts.. I'd usually blast the songs I'm listening to as loud as I possibly can. (So long as the volume does not cause my ears to ring -- which would ultimately ruin my listening experience, really.) But can you imagine how AWFUL that would be??
Say if I DO lose my hearing.. then there will be NO WAY for me to drown out those thoughts -- AT ALL!!! acckk!! I'm screwed either way. blah.

blah. blah. blah.
Everything about today is just blah.
I've been spamming my blog again. ick. I need a life. Maybe I could buy that with my duit raya. Can I?
Can somebody please knock me over on the head so the day will be over without me having to toss and turn in my bed? Please?

Funny how irked I can get when my dad didn't get me what I wanted. I am SO not good at not getting what I want. What a rotten rotten child.. I mean, I shouldn't be surprised right? I'm a pretty good reader; I read people well enough to know the kind of person that they are -- what I feel is important is most probably not important to them.
Yet when they seem to take things easy, I get disappointed still. How stupid is that? How idiotic can I be to expect things to be different when I'd KNOWN that they are capable of letting me down?

By the way.. this is just about one extra coleslaw. HAHAHHAHA! Can you imagine how STUPID I feel right now?? I am a rational enough of a person to admit that it's really not a big deal -- which is why I'm making it a big deal. IT'S JUST ONE FREAKIN' COLESLAW, DAMMIT! And I couldn't even get THAT!! ughh.. I feel so unimportant right now. That damn coleslaw represents EVERYTHING that I wish to have but didn't get.

Like.. hey, I'm asking you for a little favour but you decide that it's so little.. I wouldn't mind if you said no. Well, I MIND!!
I FREAKIN' MIND!!
Just because I was trying to be polite by saying that I didn't, I DO MIND!!! Do I need to spell everything out?!!!

shit. Now it's no longer about a coleslaw.
I shouldn't bother. Really. I'm not going to bother at all. Why bother wanting anything at all when I'll only end up being the one disappointed. Why bother? Why bother.. why bother.. why bother..
Shutting up now.